Violet Stars Happy Hunting!!! WIP 001...

About 45 minutes of work for an idea I had for a lyric picture for the song in the subject line. It's a song by Janelle Monae and it holds a really cool type of atmosphere I'd like to translate into my work. I'm pushing myself to finish and at least try to work on it a little bit everyday. So far I am just concentrating on getting her head done and I'll add more later, piece by piece.

Getting Over Myself...

The following 2 drawings were done last Tuesday. The first of this cat lady that I'm thinking about using in my Acting for Animators class, the second that little alien girl (boy???) thing. I've been talking to my friend Cassie about doing something with it. Sorry I am so lazy, not scanning my art, but at least since I don't have access to a printer at the moment my reasoning is legitimate. I'm pretty sure that was a run-on sentence or whatever but...I DON'T CARE.

I know I mentioned last post that it was mostly a matter of time and effort into my artwork but after further deliberation I've come to realize I'm also struggling to get over who I used to be. While looking over possible solutions to my lack of creative flow I came over this:

No Inspiration: Has My Personality Changed Beyond 'repair'?

I don't know what has happened. I lived and breathed art for many years. It was what kept me going. I got my self-esteem and identity from my abilities. Something has gone very wrong. I am no longer able to create. I feel my personality has changed irrepairably. I have lost a massive part of myself. It's not even really a 'block' - I have actually lost all desire to create. I am mourning my lost 'self'. :(

A great deal of myself continues to draw simply because that was me. That's what I've always done and I have defined myself in that kind of sense. Sometimes I have to question myself, if I am who I really am or if I'm pretending to be who I used to be. I think when it comes to any type of creative flow it's good to know yourself. I haven't finished anything with satisfaction in almost 6 years and I would really like for things to change. Everytime I am in front of that blank piece of paper I get lost and I don't know up from down, and I find my hand moving around doing crazy unauthorized things that only end in frustration and torn up paper.

Time...

I know nobody really reads this but I'll put my thoughts down here. I've been thinking a lot lately, about myself as an artist and how I identify myself. Right now...no, for years I've been going through an identity crisis, a never ending spiral into countless confusing facades and falsities--but I think I have it. Time.

Taking time to actually think or plan out what I want to do, taking the time to polish and finish. I've been avoiding it all. I expect masterpieces after 5 hours of effort. I look at other beautifully finished art and I tell myself how I could do better or the same. I try and fail, easily frustrated or put off by the simplest of things. I lose my hair thinking "How can I do that? I know it's in me!"

And it's time!

So yeah, I have been thinking...what have I been doing? I've wasted so much time. Out of practice and out of the norm. From now on I'd like to put in the time and put something nice here eventually.

Roger Rabbit...

We watched it during my Acting for Animators class. Doodle of the rabbit himself.

In hindsight his left hand is a teeny bit smaller than his right. His left foot looks a little bit bigger but it isn't because the paper is at a slight and taking a picture of it really didn't do it any type of justice >_<.

Bayonetta!!!

Why? Why is this game so awesome!?

It has easily become one of my all time favorite games. Anyway, the doodles were done before my Acting for Animators class like 2 weeks ago. I am lazy so of course I just took pictures of it instead of scanning it. It is kinda bent up but I figure maybe down the line I will scan the mini-Bayonetta and mess with it someday. I initially brought it on PS3 but it ran so horribly so I traded it for the 360 version. Love it!